Transitions are never easy, but they’re inevitable. In this heartfelt episode, the Unpacking Education podcast team gets real about the professional and personal changes they’ve faced on their own journeys. From job loss and career pivots to family challenges and emotional growth, Rena, Paul, and Winston share their own experiences of upheaval, uncertainty, and renewal.
As educators continue to navigate widespread change, this episode offers both solidarity and inspiration. The team explores what it means to face the unknown, manage shifting roles, and find strength in community. This episode offers real talk, reflection, and maybe even a rainbow in your storm.
What you’re supposed to do when you don’t like a thing is change it. If you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.
Maya Angelou, from her book, Wouldn’t Take Nothing for My Journey Now
Resources
The following resources are available from AVID and on AVID Open Access to explore related topics in more depth:
- Navigating Change in K–12 Education, with Michael McCormick (podcast episode)
- An Innovator’s Mindset: Empowering Students and Educators, with George Couros (podcast episode)
- AVID Future Lab: Design for Change Through PBL + Design Thinking (article collection)
- Seize Your Life and Achieve Personal Success by Starting With Your Goals, with Jasmine Brett Stringer (podcast episode)
Finding Rainbows
In the midst of chaos, how do you find calm or even growth? This episode explores the emotional complexities of transition and how educators can manage change with courage, reflection, and support. Grounded in personal stories, the team models what it means to be vulnerable, to name your feelings, and to hold space for both hardship and hope.
As Winston says, “No rain, no rainbows.” The conversation dives deep into the idea that challenges, whether chosen or thrust upon us, can lead to surprising opportunities. Whether it’s Rena’s journey back to the classroom, Winston’s reflections on family and self-doubt, or Paul’s recognition of the value in both stability and change, this episode reminds us that we’re never alone in our struggles. Change is hard, but facing it with honesty and community can make all the difference. The following are a few highlights from this episode.
- Paul: It is important to recognize what is in your control versus what is outside of your sphere of influence. Can your actions make a difference, or do you need to focus on mindset?
- Rena: Even in the midst of change, it’s important to stay positive. Rena points out that smiling can help a person live longer and that staying positive has health benefits.
- Winston: “The one thing that’s consistent in our life is change.”
- Rena: “[I’ve had] lots of changes, both professionally and personally.” Her changes have included two job changes, pursuit of an admin degree, home repairs, three children going into middle school, and health changes for one of her children.
- Rena: She points out that due to budget issues, there have been many displacements and cuts in the education field, especially in her home state of Washington.
- Rena: “I feel overwhelmed at moments and, yet, also grateful to have a job and grateful to be doing something that I get to apply my creativity and in my own personal way. I always say, ‘Lots of times, you don’t understand why things happen for years to come.’”
- Winston: He talks about his own job change, a challenging end to the school year with student crises and many new staff, enrollment in an admin program, and home repair challenges of his own.
- Paul: While his personal life has been stable, he’s been reaching out to others, including his aging parents and his two sons, who are both new homeowners and navigating that stage of adulthood. He says, “I’ve just been pouring myself into my kids and my parents.”
- Winston: “At the end of the day, the goal is to also see the rainbow.”
- Rena: “So much energy and time for me is built on building relational capacity and understanding people, building relationships, teams, trust, and that kind of builds around understanding systems and all of that.” In a new job, she has had to rebuild these types of relationships from scratch in a new environment. She says, “I’m new to everybody: new admin, new teachers, new students. I mean, everybody’s new, so it’s exhausting.”
- Paul: He reflects on changing jobs in the past and says, “It’s unsettling—you kind of get into a groove where you just know what to expect, and then everything gets upset.”
- Winston: “There are times when I have a lot of self-doubt.” He recalls the challenges of moving to a new state where he didn’t know anyone. It was then that his father reminded him of the importance of naming his feelings, including loneliness.
- Rena: “The last two years, a change was kind of thrown upon me.” She was displaced twice from her job, and her son was diagnosed with a serious medical issue.
- Winston: “There’s a lot of times, you hear: ‘Resiliency. Stick it through. Push yourself through. Push yourself through. You can make it.’” In reality, it’s important to acknowledge the struggle and not hide from it. He recalls significant changes, like moving to the United States and being unemployed and looking for a job.
- Rena: Rena’s changes were a mix of those she chose and those she didn’t. She recalls that while it was hard being displaced from a job, at least she was able to choose a new position that offered additional pathways to happiness. She says, “I can see myself being happy, and really helping kids, and this being a good place for me.”
- Rena: Sometimes, it’s important to stop fighting and accept the current situation. Rena says, “At some point, [I had to say] ‘No’ [due to] my mental health, the amount of anxiety, the not sleeping, the not being able to eat. At some point, it’s not okay.” She adds that she had to change her attitude to acceptance and believe that even an unexpected change “could be something that you end up loving.”
- Paul: “My situation was different again because I wasn’t forced to make a change. . . . Each time, I got to a point in my career where the inspiration to do the job was fading.” He recalls needing to make a choice and thinking: “I’m not really inspired, but I don’t just want to go through the motions. Do I upset everything and start over again, or do I just kind of ride it out? And it became that inflection point both times.” He’s twice chosen to change jobs, and “both times, it was the best choice for me because it reenergized me, and it made me a much better educator.”
- Paul: “Every new position that I’ve ever had made me infinitely better at what I do. . . . There’s something about having those experiences that enriches who you are.”
- Rena: “I’ve been in five districts, worked for some different companies, had these different opportunities . . . [and] I feel privileged.” Rena says those experiences have given her a huge reserve of tools that she can leverage and people she can lean on. She adds, “That opportunity, that is something that you don’t see right away, but it’s amazing how that actually helps you be stronger and better.”
- Winston: He explains that much of his motivation for change comes from the impact his family and past have had on him. He feels grateful for how others have poured their wisdom into him. He ponders, “What did they say to me? Why did they make me believe that I can do anything that I put my mind to?” He adds, “I made it out of the hoods of two different countries. I can make it somewhere else.” He says that while those changes might have been hard, something good came out of them.
- Rena: “My first choice to change was actively for my family.” She explains how she decided to change jobs to shorten her commute so that she could spend more time with her family, rather than be on the road so long each day. Ironically, that change opened new doors for her and got her interested in instructional technology and computer science, which then resulted in another new career opportunity as a digital learning coach.
- Paul: Paul observes that family often influences decisions about change, especially career change. He says, “The reason I didn’t move to another district until later in my career is because I didn’t want to move my kids. I wanted them to have that stability in the district.” It wasn’t until after his kids graduated that he took a new position in another district.
- Paul: “What’s helped me is having somebody to really talk through it with—and debrief, and unload, I guess, when you have to, and celebrate the good things. And fortunately for me, both times I made my transitions, my wife was a key player in those things.”
- Rena: “Sometimes, you just need someone to listen to you and nod.” She also adds that it’s helpful to get organized by using a calendar, spreadsheet, or some other kind of time management tool.
- Winston: He shares a few coping strategies. The first is to think about finding the rainbows in the storm. Another is to name the emotions that you’re feeling. He also talks about the benefits of using music to lift spirits.
- Paul: Rather than “fake it till you make it,” Paul suggests rewording that mantra to a more positive one: “Face it till you make it.”
- Rena: Her toolkit item is a gratitude journal.
- Winston: His addition to the toolkit is embracing the listening ears of friends.
- Paul: For his toolkit item, Paul shares Dr. Elisabeth Kübler Ross’ work, specifically the Kübler-Ross Change Curve. He says, “I’m not saying that you follow this like a recipe, but I think it’s important to realize that we go on this journey when change happens . . . [and that] you’re not alone in that experience.”
- Winston: For his one thing, Winston shares that he appreciates how he can be genuine with Paul and Rena, no matter how he’s feeling.
- Paul: “We live our own lives, and we think that we’re on this island all alone going through things, but we’re not. Everybody’s got something going on. It’s a different something, but we’re all doing life the best that we can. And I think if we understand that we’re not alone in that experience, there’s something that does kind of bring us together.”
- Rena: “It’s okay to be afraid, and it’s okay sometimes to not know what’s ahead because . . . my rainbow is out there.”
Use the following resources to continue learning about this topic.
If you are listening to the podcast with your instructional team or would like to explore this topic more deeply, here are guiding questions to prompt your reflection:
- What kinds of transitions have you experienced recently, and how have they impacted you professionally or personally?
- How do you determine what is within your control during times of change?
- What strategies help you stay positive or grounded during challenging transitions?
- When faced with a major change, how do you decide whether to shift your mindset or take action?
- How can we support colleagues who are navigating difficult transitions?
- What role do relationships and community play in managing change effectively?
- How might acknowledging fear or uncertainty actually help you grow through a transition?
- Kübler-Ross Change Curve (Elisabeth Kübler-Ross Foundation)
- Managing Change in Education: Practical Strategies to Improve Change Outcomes in K–12 (RTI International)
- Navigating Change: Tips From a Veteran (Ben Johnson via Edutopia)
#458 Managing Transitions
AVID Open Access
44 min
Transcript
———————————————————————————————————————
The following transcript was automatically generated from the podcast audio by generative artificial intelligence. Because of the automated nature of the process, this transcript may include unintended transcription and mechanical errors.
———————————————————————————————————————
Rena Clark 0:00
The one thing that’s consistent in our life is change. That was one of those changes that was like a blessing in disguise.
Paul Beckermann 0:06
Do I upset everything and start over again, or do I just kind of ride it out?
Winston Benjamin 0:11
No rain, no rainbows.
Rena Clark 0:12
So I’m looking for all those positive things, but it’s still really hard.
Winston Benjamin 0:19
The topic for today’s podcast is managing transitions. Unpacking Education is brought to you by AVID.org. AVID believes in seeing the potential of every student. To learn more about AVID, visit their website at AVID.org.
Rena Clark 0:36
Welcome to Unpacking Education, the podcast where we explore current issues and best practices in education.
Rena Clark 0:46
I’m Rena Clark.
Paul Beckermann 0:47
I’m Paul Beckermann.
Winston Benjamin 0:49
And I’m Winston Benjamin. We are educators, and
Paul Beckermann 0:53
we’re here to share insights and actionable strategies.
Transition Music with Rena’s Children 0:57
Education is our passport to the future.
Winston Benjamin 1:02
The quote for today is from Maya Angelou in her book Wouldn’t Take Nothing for My Journey Now. She writes: “What you’re supposed to do when you don’t like a thing is change it. If you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.”
Paul Beckermann 1:22
Wisdom, right?
Winston Benjamin 1:24
Yeah, wisdom. What are you thinking?
Paul Beckermann 1:28
I’m thinking about your sphere of influence. You have to know what’s in that—what can you control, what’s out of your control. When it’s in your control, ask yourself: Is there something I can do here to make my situation better? And if there’s not, you can still change your perception, right? That’s attitude, because perception is reality. If you change that, you’re changing your reality in some ways. But you have to know what’s in that sphere and what’s not.
Rena Clark 1:58
Yeah, you’re changing what you focus on. Someone just reminded me that people who are positive or smile actually live seven years longer. So I’m going to start smiling more—the health benefits! Also, with our students, it’s like for every one negative, you need five positives. But you also need that in your self-talk, because our thoughts become our actions. We have to have those positive thoughts that then become our positive actions, which really influence how we act. I can say, as someone going through a lot of change over the last two years, I had to give myself many a pep talk because I had no control over the situation. The only thing I had control over was my mental state and how I thought about it.
Winston Benjamin 2:47
So all of us are dealing with the feeling of change. The one thing that’s consistent in our life is change, and that’s the reason why we wanted to bring back this old style of the podcast where it was the crew of the Three Amigos coming back together just to talk. Because, as we sometimes realize, there’s a lot of things that go on, and there’s a lot of conversation that we could have about education and about topics within education. But sometimes it’s just important to actually take a sit down and talk about the people and talk with the people that you’re in community with so that we can deal with the fact that we’re going through change.
So first, before we do anything and talk about the relevant things in life: What’s going on, my people? What’s up with y’all? How are you? Paul, Rena, is there anything new going on? What’s going on with you? Is there anything that’s changed in the last year?
Paul Beckermann 3:42
Yeah, Rena, you got anything new going on?
Rena Clark 3:45
I mean, we could take this entire episode for me, I think, with the amount of changes I’ve gone through, especially the last two years. If you’ve been a longtime listener or not, lots of changes both professionally and personally. I don’t mind sharing out there, but yes, professionally, the last two years I have been displaced from my job two years in a row. I’ve switched districts—I’ll be in my third district now this year. Three years, three districts, three different roles.
I’m over here in Washington State where we have a huge budget crisis and cuts. I went back to school, did all my internship to do my admin, and they cut a lot of admin. I’ve been an instructional facilitator, and guess who they cut? All the instructional facilitators. So all of those roles have been cut.
I will say after 24 interviews—yes, friends, 24, some of those being three rounds for certain jobs—and making it to the final round five times, being a runner-up… As Seinfeld said, yes, you are the first loser is what it feels like when you’re a runner-up. But that was the mental state.
I am going back in the classroom after nine years of not being in the classroom, moving to middle school. I’ll be teaching middle school STEM, so I’m super excited about that, to apply all of my instructional strategies. My commute has gone from 18-20 minutes to now—I’ll tell you, the other day a bridge went down—so now it’s an hour commute each way.
I’ve had a child that is now, in the last year and a half, a Type 1 diabetic, so our entire life changed around some medical health issues. Then just the other day, I had to get a new roof. We had a water leak, new pipes. My heat went out, and another family member was in the hospital the other week. All while I’m writing curriculum for two classes—I have four preps. So a lot of things are changing right now.
Paul Beckermann 5:57
Is that all you got going on, Rena? That’s it?
Rena Clark 5:59
That’s all. And three kids going into middle school. So I was laughing because my husband also teaches middle school. I said, we’re gonna have two middle school teachers, three kids in middle school. I’m gonna be down with the lingo, y’all, for this coming year.
Paul Beckermann 6:16
The Clark House Middle School—you could do a sitcom.
Winston Benjamin 6:22
Yeah, the school mom.
Rena Clark 6:23
So I feel overwhelmed at moments and yet also grateful—grateful to have a job and grateful to be doing something that I get to apply my creativity to in my own personal way. I always say lots of times you don’t understand why things happen for years to come. I think of that Garth Brooks song “Unanswered Prayers”—it might take me five years to understand how this path is really helping me. But I truly believe that, and I feel like I’ve landed in a great place as far as the culture and community of the school.
So I’m looking for all those positive things, but it’s still really hard. I’ve cried, been upset, but just because of an overwhelming feeling more than anything. Just a few things, y’all. Just a few.
Paul Beckermann 7:15
Winston, you better share how you’re doing. How are you?
Rena Clark 7:20
I mean, you’re kind of similar-ish, yeah?
Winston Benjamin 7:22
No, I mean yeah, the last year has been really rough. Similar to Rena, I don’t know why the state of Washington—people just don’t do roofs well. A while ago, they were doing the roof on my apartment building and they ripped up the plastic cover. My ceiling collapsed, and I was in a hotel for several months. Then I moved into a new apartment.
The end of the school year was pretty good, but we had a really hard end. We had a couple of students who experienced life-altering experiences that really made us all take a step back and remember what the work is really about.
Trying to get into this school year—as Rena said, we’re down in admin. My building is up over 1,000 students. Out of our entire teacher pool, we have half of the teaching body that is brand new. We have one new counselor, so it’s just a lot of transition in the building. We have a new evaluation framework that we’re doing, so there’s a lot of work changes.
I just started school to try to get, like Rena, my admin certificate to make some changes in some ways. So adding on more and more responsibilities but recognizing they’re just what we have to do, right? Since COVID, I’ve just been bouncing and moving, trying to bounce back and change and respond to things.
My sister just got promoted to being a pastor, which is kind of crazy and cool. So there’s some family things that are going on. Just like Rena, trying to ride the good and the bad. Paul, I’m going to throw it to you. Since you gave us this floor to listen to how we’re doing, how are things with you?
Paul Beckermann 9:24
I feel guilty because I’m very grateful for the peace in my life right now. Quite honestly, I’ve just been pouring myself into my kids and my parents. My parents are mid-80s, and I just want to spend as much time with them as I can while I still am able to, and I’m grateful that I have that opportunity.
My kids both bought houses in the last few years, so I’ve been helping them, trying to get a stable foundation in their homes. We totally gutted the townhome that my youngest son bought and redid that, and put in a new bathroom in my other son’s basement. Just trying to pour into other people because, honestly, I feel kind of spoiled because I’ve had a pretty good ride myself.
Winston Benjamin 10:17
See, that’s one thing. My best friend’s mom, Ruben, she used to say this all the time, and I try to remember: No rain, no rainbows. Sometimes we’re in the rain and we can see you’re in it, and you got to recognize that you’re in the midst of something. But at the end of the day, the goal is to also see the rainbow, right? You’re not always in the bad. Sometimes we got to recognize that good times come too.
So I’m glad that the good times are rolling for you. There’s nothing wrong with sitting in that place. Also, it allows us to have somebody’s ear that we can talk to that’s not also dumping stuff on us. When you can, you do. But it feels good to have an ear that we can talk to.
Rena Clark 11:02
You’ve been there. You’ve lived it.
Paul Beckermann 11:04
I’ve had my valleys too, but right now I’m a little higher up on the mountaintop.
Winston Benjamin 11:10
So I’m just going to ask this general question because I think the quote really puts it into effect: What makes change so hard? Why is it so difficult when we are in situations of change? What makes them so hard?
Rena Clark 11:32
People. For me, it’s a lot about people because I feel like I’m very relational. Yes, it’s structures, changing systems, timing, but so much energy and time for me is built on building relational capacity and understanding people, building relationships, teams, trust. That kind of builds around understanding systems and all of that.
It’s like, oh, you’re starting over again, and you kind of have to tiptoe. But you also don’t feel seen because it’s not just one way—you’re building relationships with them, but you also feel like in a new building, no one really knows me, my deep self. So I’m also in that building stage as well. I find that can be kind of scary. It can be difficult. It takes time, no matter what you’re doing, and it can be exhausting because it takes a lot of energy.
Sometimes when you are in sync and you know people well and you know what they need, and sometimes you just have that person there, it can be really awesome. And it takes a long time to get there. So sometimes for me, the energy of people—it’s like new students, but I’m new to everybody: new admin, new teachers, new students. Everybody’s new. So it’s exhausting.
Paul Beckermann 13:08
So I’m going to think back because I have gone through some career changes for sure. I was an English teacher for 16 years, and then I moved into the media center. So that was a big change, but it was still in the same school, so it was less of a scary thing. Then nine years later, I jumped ship and took my 27 years of seniority and left—left my tenure behind—and went to a new school district to be a digital learning specialist at the district level.
I think why that’s hard is because it’s a little bit being afraid of the unknown. Will I be okay? Is it going to be okay? I don’t really know what’s ahead. When you don’t know what’s ahead, it’s unsettling. You get into a groove where you just know what to expect, and then everything just gets upset. It’s changed. I think that’s what makes it hard for me. You kind of have to bet on yourself and just say, well, if I’m good enough, it’ll be okay. And if I’m not good enough, then I guess I’m not good enough. But I’m going to do my best and see what happens.
Winston Benjamin 14:13
I mean, I love that, but I’ll say there are times when I have a lot of self-doubt. That’s for sure my biggest struggle in life. Similar to Rena, I think it’s the sharing of myself to people. But I think for me, the biggest thing that makes change hard is trusting my choice, right?
There are times when—like when I first moved to Washington from Boston, I didn’t know anyone, and I was like, oh my. I talked to my dad, and I realized my dad has a really twisted way of naming things and dealing with it. I had bought a Betta fish just as something to keep me occupied while I was sitting around doing nothing. I was talking to my dad, and I was like, yeah, I’m trying to come up with a name. And he was like, yo, name him Lonely.
I was like, what? Why should I name him Lonely? I don’t want to talk to him every day about being lonely. And he was like, yeah, you have to make the choice to be in your loneliness. It’s okay to be lonely. It’s a part of things. You have people you love, but if you want to start great things, you got to trust that your loneliness is worth it.
Paul Beckermann 15:31
Was he calling you a Betta fish? What was he calling?
Winston Benjamin 15:35
No, he wanted me to see that I could take care of myself as I’m taking care of life. I’m the youngest of the family, so to actually feel that I know how to take care of myself is a big thing my parents worry about. Still to this day, I’m their baby.
But it was his way of telling me to name the thing that I was feeling that I couldn’t name. And also by naming it, being able to process it. So he’s got a little twisted way of doing things, but it was a really great way. Because look at me now—I’m in Washington. I’ve done well. I’ve gotten a PhD. The trust in the process and trusting myself in the decision that I made, I think that was the hardest. Because I didn’t want to go back to people and say I didn’t do it right. So I think that’s a bit of the fear in the change for me—that I can’t look back and then worry about their judgment. Why did you do it? Why try? That’s hard for me.
Rena Clark 16:44
On my journey—I mean, I talked about the last two years—change was kind of thrown upon me in a way. I did try to make some changes, but being displaced or having some serious medical issues arise, that’s like a change thrown on you. Winston also talked about how lots of times we have the option, a choice, to make a change. So it’s kind of thinking through how do you know when you’re supposed to make a change or change your attitude, which we talked about at the beginning? There’s a difference between the two.
Winston Benjamin 17:20
I think for me, it’s hard to know when you’re supposed to change your attitude because there’s a lot of times you hear resiliency: stick it through, push yourself through, you can make it. That’s sometimes really hard to actually say, nah, I’m good with this. I’m really good with trying to give the stiff upper lip. I’m really good with trying to put a good face up.
That’s sometimes the hardest part for me—recognizing I don’t have to keep up a good face when I’m hurting, right? I’ll keep going through until something forces me to change. So that second part of the quote is really hard for me—to acknowledge you don’t have to keep smiling through it. I think that’s why I don’t know when it’s time to make the change because I’ve always been thrown into changes. Like when my parents moved to the United States, the choice to move to Washington—I had to, I was unemployed, so I had to make a decision. So it’s hard for me to know when to change my attitude.
Rena Clark 18:41
I was in a unique situation this year because I was displaced, and honestly, I was not happy with my displacement at all. So I was actively seeking other jobs, but I knew I wanted to make a change. I was going to make a change.
I will tell you, working two full-time jobs, applying and applying—I’ll just let you know, in Washington here, I left a fourth-grade teaching position. The day there was 180 people that applied for that job when I left. That’s just to give you an idea of what we’re looking at here in Washington. With admin, for every admin job, there’s 80 to 100-plus people applying for Assistant Principal jobs. I’m talking people applying with 10-20 years of experience because they were displaced. Just to give you an overview of the situation.
But it was interesting because although I wanted to make a change and had interviews, at some point I was happy because I got a job. I did have choice over that, and it was in the realm of something I wanted to do—being creative. At what point was it like, okay, this is okay, and now I need to change my attitude? This is going to be okay. This is good.
So it was like both for me—I had choice and I had to change my attitude because that wasn’t what I saw myself doing exactly. But it still was much better than where I was, and I can see myself being happy and really helping kids in this, being a good place for me. So it was like a weird “yes, and.” At some point, people say just keep trying, work your hardest. I’m like, at some point, no—my mental health, the amount of anxiety, the not sleeping, the not being able to eat—at some point it’s not okay.
So we feel you out there, and especially some new educators, especially if you’re in Washington, because I know there’s a lot of subbing going to be happening. It is okay that sometimes—I don’t want to say settle because it’s not settle—but it’s for now. Or maybe you don’t know the opportunity that will create, or that it could be something that you end up loving that you never knew that you could love. So that’s to me when that attitude really needs to change.
Paul Beckermann 20:55
See, my situation was different again because I wasn’t forced to make a change necessarily. Each time that I changed careers, I chose to. But mine was kind of—each time I got to a point in my career where the inspiration to do the job was fading. It’s like I’ve done this now for a long time. I kind of do this in my sleep. I’m not really inspired by it, but I don’t just want to go through the motions. Do I upset everything and start over again, or do I just kind of ride it out?
It became that inflection point both times because the easy thing to do would be just to ride it out—just keep doing what I’m doing, don’t make any waves in my life. It’ll be okay, but it’s not very gratifying. So each time I decided, well, I’m just going to do it. I got to shake things up. And both times, it was the best choice for me because it re-energized me and it made me a much better educator.
I realized too that every new position that I’ve ever had made me infinitely better at what I do on the next one. There’s just something about having those experiences that enriches who you are and made me just a better educator all around. So it’s a little bit different. Mine really was all about attitude, and I had to decide: Was I okay coasting it out, or did I want to take a risk that maybe it wouldn’t work out, but it could be really good? So I jumped, I guess.
Rena Clark 22:28
I love that you are willing to do that, and I think that’s why, Paul, you have such great insights. You went for it. Tell you what, I’ve been scared a lot lately. You talk about that opportunity knowledge, and I will tell you, having now—I know it sounds—I’ve been in five districts, worked for some different companies, had these different opportunities, different—I’ve worked K-12 at this point.
I will tell you, my lens when I look at something or students, I feel privileged. The lens and the tools that I can draw on, or people, the contacts I have beyond just right there that I can reach—that opportunity, that is something that you don’t see right away, but it’s amazing how that actually helps you be stronger and better.
Paul Beckermann 23:19
So sometimes it sounds like sometimes we’ve had an opportunity to make the change—we’ve gotten to choose—and sometimes we haven’t. So when there is a choice, how do we—I kind of talked about my own experience—but how do we know when we should make that change? How do we encourage ourselves to take that risk and to make that next step?
Winston Benjamin 23:41
Ah, Paul, why do you always got to make me reflect on my life? This is so tough.
No, because again, I think about the time—to this day, I still remember the first day I saw snow: January 21, 1989. I was thrown into everything—change, language, school, weather. Winter was the worst thing and still is the worst thing that I’ve ever seen. Any human being who says they want to live in it, come on out. It just doesn’t make sense. Winston, come on over. No, I keep telling you, Paul, if it’s wintertime, I’m never coming. But I love you enough to say negative anything doesn’t make sense to me.
But I think for me, including coming to Washington, the thing that made me make the change was looking at my family and acknowledging how much change they’ve made in order to give me a chance. I think it’s not a selfish thing, but a way to pay forward the act of the things my parents did, right? Changing and coming to America and then saying, yo, I don’t know any rules, but I’m gonna try to help you make the rules. There’s a power in that.
I think if I don’t make the changes, how can I ever say that I come from a family that’s given everything for me? Since I was the youngest one here, I had the most opportunities in this country. I had everything like tried to be given to me. So I think for me, that’s how I encourage myself to make the change. I think back and sit and just talk to myself about what did my parents do? What did they say to me? Why did they make me believe that I can do anything that I put my mind to?
So sitting down and having to relive those moments and being like, yo, I made it out the hoods of two different countries, right? I can make it somewhere else. So looking back on it and then acknowledging that those changes might have been hard, but something good came out of them.
Paul Beckermann 25:55
That gratitude you have for those past experiences and the support you got, Winston, that’s really powerful.
Rena Clark 26:01
I love that. I was thinking—I mean, before all this, before all the pushed-upon changes, I had made active changes in my life. I’m at my year 20, and I’m thinking about the different purposes and reasons. Honestly, as a mother—and I have a lot of educators listening that are parents—we make changes for our family.
So my first choice to change was actively for my family. If you haven’t been listening, I have three kids—twins, and then my older child is only 18 months older. So I had three kids under the age of two, and that was a lot. I was commuting quite far. So I actively made a choice to switch districts and had a much shorter commute. When I was there, that was one of those changes that was like a blessing in disguise. I met an amazing team that then encouraged me.
I’ve always been very interested in instructional technology, and that got me into computer science. Then a few years later, a job opened up in another district for a digital learning coach. It was funny—my husband actually asked me. So then I made another change, and this wasn’t for family. This was for me because I wanted to grow. I was very interested in adult learning, possibly going back to school. So that’s when I took a leap of faith. I was like, okay, I’m gonna apply for this job. I ended up getting that job, and that was another huge change—a new district, a completely different role.
I learned so much around coaching and facilitating, and that’s when AVID kind of pulled me in. I started writing curriculum, doing all these different things that I hadn’t foreseen, but it really stretched me and my love of learning. Honestly, I think as educators, I just love learning. Then my passion around my why and access for all kids, especially around STEM and computer science, really powered me up.
That pushed me to go into other areas and collaborate with other people, write grants, and even open my own small business that is consulting. So all of these little choices lead to something else, and those are all changes I chose to make. There are choices you get sometimes. Sometimes you don’t. But it’s that winding road. It reminds you of that country song that was played at weddings—I forget—it’s like the winding road that led me to you. When you look backwards, it makes sense, but at the moment, it doesn’t necessarily make sense. But it does eventually because it’d be boring. We wouldn’t have any rainbows, like you said. We got to have some storms.
But I knew I was ready to make that choice when—kind of like you, Paul—I was just getting bored with myself. I was like, this is—I need something more, and I feel like I had more to give in a different way. I was ready to make that change.
Paul Beckermann 28:54
You know, there’s an interesting throughline here because Winston talked about the impact his family made on his decisions. You talked about it, Rena. Actually, I didn’t talk about it, but probably the reason I didn’t move to another district until later in my career is because I didn’t want to move my kids. I wanted them to have that stability in the district. So in a sense, I moved within the district the first time because that didn’t upset their lives.
But the next time I felt like I was kind of free and clear to do what I wanted—it was my wife and I, and we made that decision mutually together. We both actually moved to that new district together. So family’s a big deal.
Rena Clark 29:36
Absolutely. So we are talking about all these changes we’re going through, and we’re going to have ups and downs. But ultimately—and we know many of you are going through changes, personal, professional—how do we make change a positive experience? And y’all, if you want to share, what has helped you? Yeah, what’s a strategy that we might share for the listeners that could possibly help them?
Paul Beckermann 30:07
I’ll start this time since my experiences always seem to be a little different. What’s helped me is having somebody to really talk through it with and debrief and unload, I guess, when you have to, and celebrate the good things. Fortunately for me, both times I made my transitions, my wife was a key player in those things.
The first time I moved to the media center, she was the media specialist in our adjacent middle school, so I had somebody who understood my experience and I could talk to her about it. When we moved to our new district, we moved together. We could talk about those things.
Now, I realize not everybody has something that convenient that they can talk to, but find somebody that you have some sort of a shared experience with. Because, as we’ve talked about today, everybody’s going through some kind of change, and you can relate at least on that level, even if the change is different.
Rena Clark 31:01
Absolutely. I feel like I’m lucky in that same sense. My husband’s an educator, and now this year we’re literally—he’s a CTE, Career Technical Ed middle school teacher. I’m now going to be a CTE middle school teacher, and I’m literally—I helped him. I’m pulling things from his content because I’m putting together curriculum.
So I have that support, and he is very understanding and supportive. Sometimes he doesn’t know how to deal with all my energy that I’m feeling, but he’s there to listen. If you haven’t ever watched that YouTube video, “It’s Not About the Nail,” look it up. Yes, it’s not about—sometimes you just need someone to listen to you. You need that person, and it might be a friend that’s completely—if this is about education—removed, because they just need to listen and nod. Get it off your chest. It can be so, so helpful.
But for me also, it’s organization, especially with my kids, my family. Calendars are my friends—Google Calendar, spreadsheets. Time management, I’m working on it, even blocking out time: I’m going to do this during this time. I need to do this during this time. I’m trying to be more productive because time is a real thing. You only have so much, and I need to sleep. I still need to give myself time for my one thing, whether it’s my tap class or going on a run. I’m trying to figure out how to fit it all in because I also know that you are important too.
You’re not going to be perfect the first time out. If you’re a veteran educator, I almost think it’s worse because you know too much. As you’re going in, my expectations—I just know so much that it’s hard to almost pull back and just be like, I can do a little bit at a time. So the grace is the word, I guess.
Winston Benjamin 33:01
That is—yeah. I’ve named two of the things that I do as my strategies, and they came from OGs in my life who taught me a lot: my man’s mom and my dad. The idea is “no rain, no rainbows.” I got to say to myself all the time, and even when I’m really down, I think about double rainbows. Oh, double rainbows! There’s something special about it, right? Like that silly video of just—life happens. It’s going to be. So that first part—there is no good without bad.
Then my pops, his point about naming the thing that’s going on and actually dealing with it, that has been the hardest part of any strategy—actually naming my fear and then identifying what it is, and then thinking through ways of how do I help myself.
Then I’ve added, I love music, and there’s tons of songs that will bring you into a feel and then bring you out. I listen to some Buju Banton, “Hills and Valleys,” right? Just songs where I know the end is gonna make me go through it but then bring me up with the crescendo, the way the song ends. I’ve made it through that emotional space.
So I think it’s just actually naming the things that you’re dealing with, claiming it, and then speaking out into the world what you will do with it after. I think sometimes that’s important—to honestly face it. Because you make it—nah, honestly face it. Don’t fake it till you make it. Yo, that’s still putting on the front. But I hear what you’re saying.
Paul Beckermann 34:49
So saying face it till you make it. Face it till you make it.
Rena Clark 34:56
I’m putting that. I love it.
Winston Benjamin 34:58
Face it till you make it. Yeah.
Paul Beckermann 35:01
All right. We’ve been dropping a lot of tools here, but I think it’s time we officially jump into our toolkit.
Transition Music with Rena’s Children 35:06
Check it out. Check it out. Check it out. Check it out. What’s in the toolkit? Check it out.
Paul Beckermann 35:19
All right, toolkit time. Who’d like to go first today?
Rena Clark 35:21
I can go first. I know I’ve mentioned this before, but just a quick gratitude journal—three words. If you want it to be that short, you can even record yourself. But there’s something about intentionally taking time to write things that you are thankful for. That goes all the way back to that quote—changing the mindset and your attitude.
You can do this if you have a difficult class. What is something you’re grateful for in that class? If you have a difficult student, what is something you’re grateful for about that student? It can go down to whatever that thing—almost what you’re struggling with the most is what you need to think about what you’re grateful for. So I find that to be super helpful.
Winston Benjamin 36:00
Paul, you said it. I’ll steal yours: Talk to somebody. I laugh with my homies. I call up my friends and be like, yo, you remember when this? I went from college, from New York City to a small, small town—Norton, Massachusetts—that had one blinking light. It was like, yo, we in it.
So I call my friends and laugh about the changes that we’ve been through so that I actually acknowledge the beauty that comes out of it. Because sometimes you just got to tell it to somebody who knows you, who knows where you’ve been and how to make you see the greatness that you have. That’s awesome.
Paul Beckermann 36:39
All right, I’m going to get academic on you. So there’s something called the Kübler-Ross change curve. Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross was the one who came up with the five stages of grief, which I think most people are familiar with. But she also came up with this change curve thing, and it goes from shock to denial to frustration to depression, where you kind of hit the bottom. Then it starts coming up again. You experiment and try something, and then you make a decision that you’re really going to go for it here. Then you actually integrate some kind of new lifestyle or change into your life, into who you are as a person.
I’m not saying that you follow this like a recipe, but I think it’s important to realize that we go on this journey when change happens in our life. Yeah, you’re going to have shock and denial at first, right? And it’s going to be frustrating and depressing before you can dig yourself out on the other side. But if you know that you’re not alone in that experience, man, I just think that’s powerful.
Rena Clark 37:44
It’s kind of like that curve with the—for our new teachers, yeah.
Winston Benjamin 37:49
The dip, yeah.
Paul Beckermann 37:52
The innovation curve is another one. I mean, they’re all kind of similar.
Winston Benjamin 37:55
It’s a definite growth—come up, come down.
Paul Beckermann 38:00
And I don’t know why, but on the roller coaster, going down is the part that gives everybody a thrill. But in real life, you don’t want to be doing that.
Rena Clark 38:09
No, it’s the butterfly in the stomach. I don’t want the stomach ache.
Paul Beckermann 38:14
Save it for the amusement park!
Rena Clark 38:20
Maybe that’s why, as adults, we don’t like roller coasters as much. We’re like, it’s not fun anymore.
Paul Beckermann 38:25
Maybe it’s like, oh no, that reminded me of that change.
Transition Music 38:28
It’s time for that one thing. Time for that one thing. That one thing!
Rena Clark 38:42
Well, that gets us into our one thing, although we’ve had a lot of things. So we’re going to hit you up with one more thing to end the episode here. Do y’all have one thing you’re still thinking about? Want to share? What is that one thing we have left?
Winston Benjamin 38:57
I’m going to jump in. Yo, I really like y’all.
Paul Beckermann 39:01
Hey, we like you too, Winston.
Winston Benjamin 39:03
I appreciate that. I really get to be genuine with you, right? All of it. I get to be genuine with you, and I appreciate that. Because, like you said, Rena, the relationships that we have—sometimes we feel like we got to fake the funk and present something else. But I can be like, yo, today is tough for me, and there’s no judgment. You appreciate me as I come. So I just want to say y’all are my one thing. I really appreciate y’all for being the crew.
Rena Clark 39:40
Oh yeah. So I got the crew still. It’s not changing. Thank goodness. Yeah. How about you, Paul?
Paul Beckermann 39:51
You know, I’m always struck by the fact that we live our own lives and we think that we’re on this island all alone going through things. Yeah, but we’re not. Everybody’s got something going on. It’s a different something, but we’re all doing life, the best that we can. I think if we understand that we’re not alone in that experience, there’s something that does kind of bring us together.
Hopefully you have somebody that you can talk to, kind of like Winston was mentioning. We kind of feel like family here, and we’re comfortable with each other. I hope you have some space like that in your life because that can help.
Rena Clark 40:32
It sure does. I love something Winston said, but it’s almost good for me—it’s accepting that it’s kind of okay to be afraid. Like, it’s okay that I’m afraid of the unknown. I don’t know what’s ahead right now. And I, shockingly y’all, like to be in control. That would never come across. I’m the alpha. Anyways, if you hear the kids—sorry. If you’re a middle school teacher, you know what I’m talking about. Winston is dying because we all know.
But I think for me, to just say it’s okay to be afraid and model that, even to my kids lately—they’re like, Mom, how are you doing? I go, I’m doing good, but you know what? I’m actually nervous. I was like, I’m kind of scared. And they’re like, oh, you’re scared? I’m like, yeah.
And with our students even, like you said, Paul, remembering everyone’s going through something you don’t know, it almost helps us be better. We can empathize, sympathize better with others, to remember, oh yeah, we’re afraid. It’s okay to be afraid, and it’s okay sometimes to not know what’s ahead. Because you know what? By golly, Winston, my rainbow is out there.
Winston Benjamin 41:45
We’re gonna find a pot of gold.
Rena Clark 41:49
And it might be a rainbow for a minute. It might be a rainbow for a day. When we talk about rainbows, we got to find the rainbows where we can.
Winston Benjamin 41:56
Yes, yes. Then yo, yes. So I just want to say to the listeners, thank you for listening to us be vulnerable with you. Thank you for giving us an opportunity to actually have your ears. Also, if you are going through some change and you just don’t know where to go, talk to somebody. Turn to somebody. Hopefully you do have a community that you can share what’s going on with.
It’s like Maya Angelou said in it—it’s about the attitude. If we can’t change the thing, we can possibly look at it in a different way to see how we can get a benefit out of it. So we appreciate you as you listen to us. If you are in a change and you don’t find somebody to talk to, maybe a therapist or anything—there’s a lot of people who are willing to listen. And thank you for listening.
Rena Clark 42:44
Thanks for listening to Unpacking Education.
Winston Benjamin 42:47
We invite you to visit us at avidopenaccess.org, where you can discover resources to support student agency and academic tenacity to create a classroom for future-ready learners.
Paul Beckermann 42:59
We’ll be back here next Wednesday for a fresh episode of Unpacking Education.
Rena Clark 43:05
And remember, go forth and be awesome.
Winston Benjamin 43:08
Thank you for all you do.
Paul Beckermann 43:10
You make a difference.